His loyalty had proven unwavering,
I leer about as he assumes he is not seen,
he maintains decade long routines,
attends to his own,
navigating difficulties diligently.
Daily, when he assumes no one is watching,
he proves to his loyalties,
that he is nothing if not dedicated to them,
that he survives by building them around him.
He has raised a community,
sole coordinator,
sole funding,
after all,
he was a philanthropist,
with a sword.
For a time,
he chose to confide in me,
only after a wicked deal,
a deal in which we bound each other.
From there began War,
espionage at its finest.
True privilege to rival a man so competent,
adapting to each others furthering curiosity,
developing strategies around the others.
At times coordinating as though,
we had been factory cut adjacent,
perfectly aligning, functioning.
A sensible War may recruit allies,
hands to lend in scheming,
our pool of recruits did not share our,
enthusiasm,
what they did was notice,
notice the depth of our coordinations,
notice the effort we had separately put to detail.
For a time I thought he trusted me,
that he stayed because he chose,
that he found my presence intoxicating,
that the mutual effort of countless hours,
had meant I earned a place with his loyalties.
His traveling cart,
from which he provided all wares,
carrying only what those of his own needs,
two towns over, axels bow, wheels creak,
It’s frame had collapsed entirely,
with it,
went the man’s soul.
All he had ever been,
all he ever was to anyone,
was a philanthropist.
Not to me,
I 𝘚𝘢𝘸 him,
I saw his means,
I learned his motive,
I have never adored anyone more.
He says to me,
that I am held in a higher regard than others.
He says to me,
I am worth cherishing.
He says to me,
that he wants to be witness of my actions.
Here I have found his loyalty,
has a fault,
it has always been me.
We have done this before,
and we will find ourselves here again.
I find that he will devote himself,
dedicate his being,
only to those who would not do the same,
for he could not bear witness,
to let them suffer in this way,
to have them claw and grasp at their chest,
eyes brimming and breath baying,
yearning and craving,
in the way he has.
I find that he does not realize,
his failure to be known,
to want, to be known,
is what will dissolve his being.
Image is not mine~
Comment