What Is Wrong With The Pittsburgh Steelers?

Alright. Deep breath, y’all. Let’s talk about the Pittsburgh Steelers. A franchise so rich in history, yet somehow right now, they're a perfect mix of delusion, dysfunction, and “What in the actual hell are you doing?”

This is “What Is Wrong With The Pittsburgh Steelers?” — a question as eternal as the Terrible Towel itself, except now the towel is being used to mop up the tears of Steelers fans everywhere.

Let’s break this mess down.

THE QUARTERBACK ROOM

So let me get this straight:

You had Kenny Pickett.

You brought in Russell “Mr. Let’s Ride Into Irrelevance” Wilson.

You took a flyer on Justin Fields, a guy who’s never had a real shot behind a functioning O-line.

Then you just… let them all go.

And now you’re left with… drumroll please…

Mason Rudolph… and the ghost of Aaron Rodgers’ Achilles tendon?

ARE Y’ALL OK OVER THERE?

It’s like the Steelers saw a crowded quarterback room and said, “Hmm. What if we just burn it all down and hand the keys to a 41-year-old ayahuasca evangelist and a guy who’s basically the NFL version of expired mayonnaise?”

Let’s not forget: Will Howard is also here, a rookie who might eventually be decent but is currently playing third fiddle behind Father Time and Father... I Guess?

COACHING

Look, Mike Tomlin is a good coach. Hall of Fame worthy? Maybe.

But right now? He’s the king of mediocrity.

If 9-8 was a person, it would wear sunglasses indoors and give motivational speeches at gas stations.

Tomlin hasn’t had a losing season, sure — but maybe that’s the problem. The bar’s so low, Steelers fans are out here bragging about “at least we didn’t suck too bad!”

Isn’t the standard supposed to be the standard?

Because the standard right now looks like a wild card loss and some light existential dread.

THE OFFENSE

You ever watch a Steelers offensive drive and feel like you’ve been sent back in time?

1st and 10: halfback dive.

2nd and 9: halfback dive again.

3rd and long? Pray to God and toss it to Pat Freiermuth.

It’s like they’re allergic to innovation. Najee Harris is running like he’s stuck in peanut butter, the offensive line blocks like they’re in a trust fall exercise, and the only way George Pickens gets the ball is if he screams into the void hard enough.

This team needs a modern offensive scheme.

Hell, I’d settle for a functioning one.

FRONT OFFICE DECISIONS

The Steelers front office looked at their QB situation and said,

“Let’s take Russell Wilson and Justin Fields. No downside!”

Then three months later they said,

“Okay, that was a mistake. Let’s sign a quarterback who might still be hallucinating from his last darkness retreat and hasn’t played a full season since TikTok was a dancing app.”

There’s no clear plan. No vision. It’s just chaos.

Chaos with a black and gold color scheme and a fanbase that yells at their TV like it owes them money.

THE FUTURE

Sure. There’s always hope. Will Howard could surprise us all. Aaron Rodgers might be able to stand upright without spontaneously combusting.

Maybe George Pickens ascends to football godhood.

But until they stop running their QB room like a game of Madden franchise mode on drugs, until they build a real offensive identity, and until they stop mistaking “not losing badly” for “winning,” they’ll keep spinning in circles.

So what’s wrong with the Steelers?

A better question might be: what isn’t?

They’ve got a proud history, a ionate fanbase, and a legacy of winning — and right now, they’re dragging all of that through the mud while yelling “TRUST THE PROCESS!” like this is some kind of spiritual awakening.

But hey — at least y’all still have the Penguins.

Oh, wait