Bigender Vent Art or Something

(Like the title says, this is kind of a vent thing...)

Hi, I feel like I'm never going to have the body that I want and decided to draw some art to vent my frustrations.

It was going to have an actual guy and girl in the background but I got too lazy oof

But yeah, I started referring to myself as bigender because I feel like it's the only way I can easily explain my gender, if that makes sense? I usually feel comfortable with being female, but there's always this little part of me that keeps coming back that makes me desire being more than "just female". I don't feel like I would be happy being just male either though.

It kinda just grown over the years with me wanting and wishing I could be both, but I feel like that would be impossible. I tried seeing if I could have both sets of genitalia, but the sources that I looked at said it would be impossible unless I was born male... Even if I could do it, I have to pay the bill and rent while working for minimum wage with little to no hours because my boss doesn't want to deal with my mental disorders...(In other words, I'm more broke than a country with no government)

So yeah, I'm a sad hooman :)