“ⅈ’ꪑ ᠻⅈꪀꫀ.” {𝔸𝕣𝕥 𝔾𝕦𝕚𝕝𝕕 #𝟡 𝔼𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕪}

“ɪ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜ. ɪ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ɪ ᴡᴀꜱ ꜰɪɴᴇ. ʙᴜᴛ ɪ’ᴍ ɴᴏᴛ. ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ?”

•••

•••

I told you. I’m fine. But I’m not. I’m trapped in the illusion of safety and security. Where I can’t befall to any tragedy or pain.

But I’m wrong. I smile. I say ‘I’m okay.’ But I’m not. Why can’t you see that? Can’t you see through the cracks of my faked facade? Can’t you deduce the dead color in my eyes? The once rich color of the glistening sea reduced to nothing but a pale blue film.

My movements aren’t my own. My body no longer houses the youthful free soul of an innocent child. I’ve seen the world. The horror. The prejudice majesty. And all it’s glory. I saw it. See it. Still.

I’m crumbling from within. Picking up the pieces and stuffing them back into a mangled puzzle. One that is distorted and ruined from years of mental torture and neglect. Why can’t you see it? I say ‘I’m fine.’ But I’m not. Isn’t saying ‘I’m fine’ a red flag to others that I’m not okay? I’m not fine. But I am. But I’m not.

Can’t you see it? My tears flowing like endless rivers of pain and sorrow down my skin. Stinging my eyes and leaving no gleaming color of light to reflect in the opaque emptiness. I’m here. But I’m not. But I am.

The darkness wrapping its dastardly fingers around my shoulders. Beckoning me into it’s deathly arms. It’s comforting. But not. I hate it. But I love it. I’m wanted there. Not here. Am I? The light is so beautiful, but false. The cold void numbs my pain. My grief. My stress. My sorrow. My agony. Can’t you see it? Can’t you?

I’m fine.

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Edit: thank you for the feature!!! :bow: ‍♀

#artguild9