✵The Diary of a Dinosaur✵

Contains swearing

I really don't like to swear but sometimes you gotta sacrifice to get funny content

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Day One

George kept stealing my fish, that little fucker. I hope he gets killed by a rock.

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Day Two

There was this really pretty pterodactyl that flew over me today. We would of totally hooked up if she hadn't tried to eat me.

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Day Three

The world is a large, scary place. A giant fish almost swallowed me. I'm so fucking done with this whole eat-or-be-eaten thing.

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Day Four

I can't find my mom anywhere.

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Day Five

I think my mom's been eaten.

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Day Six

It's been a while since I've found any good food.

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Day Seven

I accidentally ate Charlie. I know he was my bro but damn did he taste good.

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Day Eight

I went on a date with Sabrina. She didn't say much, all she did was scream and run around. I don't think we speak the same language.

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Day Nine

Im surrounded by idiots. Gerald fell off of a cliff.

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Day Ten

I found a dino that looks like my mom. I would've said "Hi" but she was attacked by that giant ugly walnut with sharp teeth. Oh well.

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Day Eleven

I banged this one dino that was sorta stupid but hopefully she gets preggars so I can eat our children.

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Day Twelve

I found these eggs but when I tried to take one some crazy bird dudes tried to kill me with their fabulous feathers. It didn't work.

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Day Thirteen

My girl ran off. I hope she gets eaten by a fucking dinosaur.

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Day Fourteen

Its gotten awfully hot here. I saw a shooting star and I wished for muscles, then I could get all the ladies.

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Day Fifteen

The plants are dying. Like my soul. I guess I gotta go back to chomping on fish.

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Day Sixteen

The water's disappearing. I bet you this is Tim's fault. He probably broke our world.

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Day Seventeen

Tim definitely broke something. I'm going to hunt that little asshole down.

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Day Eighteen

Im so weak, no one will let me eat them.

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Day Nineteen

It's so hot. I'm gonna die.

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Day Twenty

The Star is closer now.

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Day Twenty One

I think we're all going to die, so I'm going to skinny dip in the puddle by my house. YOLO bitches.

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And... Well, you know the rest :sweat_smile: