Sending My Love To You

ℛ,

Everywhere I look, I find more and more reasons to miss you. Little things like: your favorite car, favorite color, favorite TV show, and favorite genre of music. I still can't listen to 'We Didn't Start the Fire’ by Billy Joel without getting all teary eyed. Not a day goes by where I don't think about you - in everything I do. You mean the word to me and I wish I was able to show you a piece of mine, I think you'd really enjoy it. From wherever you are, I know that you're watching over me and I hope you can be proud of all that I've accomplished - even if that's nothing at all.

Do you all the fun we used to have? The laughs that were had because of something we had done? I them; Banana, show and tell, and let's not forget the baby bird. Oh, the fun we'd find ourselves going into. I miss it. I miss it so much. I didn't compose this letter to reminisce, though - even if some part of me wants to. To put it simply, I wrote this as my way of talking to you. Telling you all about my life and all that’s happened in it, since you’ve been gone.

M and E are doing great. M is the spitting image of you and sometimes I wonder if you would look the same as her - were you a girl. It’s a silly thought, I know, but it keeps me focusing on the positives rather than the negatives. They may have been really young when you left them, E just a tiny infant, but that doesn’t mean they have forgotten you any less. M and S hardly ever talk about you and when they do, they cry. Which is normal, I guess, but it’s been almost 11 years and they still refuse to say anything about you. I wonder if K had anything to do with why they don’t. I digress . . .

You always encouraged me to write and you’ll be happy to know that I have been writing consistently since your last birthday. I usually write whatever comes to my mind; whether that be poems, short stories, or actual chapter novels. Mom reads my chapter story and itches for an update. I’m sure if you were here today, you’d like it as well. You were always more open minded than some people I know. Speaking of writing, I’m part of this writing community and there was a poem challenge having something to do with stars so, naturally, I wrote about you and how you were a star that was just out of my reach. It’s one of my favorite poems, that I have written, to this day.

The fondest memory I have of you, is your wedding day. It was such a beautiful ceremony. What made you guys choose silver and blue as your colors? Don’t get me wrong, I love those colors together, I just didn’t know what made you choose those two in particular. Speaking of your colors, I still have the shawl I wore for it. Reminds me of that day and how handsome you looked in your suit. You were so happy, especially when you saw S walking down that aisle in her dress. You couldn’t stop smiling - ready to start a family of your own.

Since we’re on the topic of weddings, let me tell you about D - my fiance. He’s the greatest person I have ever met. We met online a few months before my 18 birthday and at the time, I had just gotten out of a relationship - so I wasn’t looking to start anything soon. We still continued to talk and throughout our late night Skype sessions, often lasting more than 12 hours, we fell in love. It was hard at first, seeing that he was on the other side of the country, but we made it work. Almost a year into the relationship, he proposed. After our child was born, I moved across the country to be with him. He cares for both P and I, never ceasing to amaze me everyday. We haven’t yet decided when we’re going to get married, but I think we both like things the way they are now and don’t want to change them. You would get along great with him, he’s into a lot of the same things you were. Hunting, fishing, cars, and a couple other things. We could have even started our own band! You on the trumpet, D on the drums, and me on the clarinet. We'd probably be a super bad band, but at least we’d have fun.

Where do I begin in telling you about P? I guess I'll start by saying, you would have liked her. She's outgoing and loves being outside. In some ways, she reminds me of you - always has a hankering for adventure. Recently, she's been going through a climbing faze where she'll climb on anything and everything. I swear, she wants to fly away like a bird. Every time there's a nice day outside, we go out and she runs around picking up whatever she can find - mostly sticks or leaves. Sometimes, I imagine what it'd be like if you were here to see her; what you guys would do, how she would like you, if you became inseparable, things like that. Every time I think of those things, I can't help but to smile - knowing you guys would have been the best of friends, just like we were.

I hope that wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, you always have a smile on your face. Don't worry about me down here, I'm doing just fine - even if I miss my best friend. You're not forgotten either, I know that's a fear you had, but I find you in the simplest of things. You will always be ed no matter how long it's been since you've been gone. Just , “You're never fully dressed without a smile.”

Your favorite (and only) niece,

ℰ

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Please let me know what you think of this - it's incredibly personal to me. It practically took me the whole month to complete.

Word count: 1,011

#QoTEvent