Um, hey folks?
I received a pretty disturbing anonymous email related to this YOI amino, and I don’t even understand most of it because if a ton of name dropping and fandom tumblr stuff and I have no clue who anyone is and I don’t use tumblr and if anyone follows me here or has, I’m not exaggerating that I really don’t know how to use my phone or apps. Huge learning curve. I know very, very few people here (I only chat with 3 because I am extremely uncomfortable about personal boundaries it takes a lot for me to message someone out of the blue; those fine folks messaged me first and I’m very happy but...).
Being honest, I felt mildly threatened at the end of the email with a comment about exposure and almost like me picking sides and how they’re hoping I’m someone and just... I have no clue what I actually read. My head is still reeling. I don’t know what they want except them wanting me to leave the amino because no one cares about my presence except for cosplay. Which probably is true because I don’t talk much or post things that aren’t about cosplay...
So getting an email about being stalked... with the irony of someone tracking down my personal website and using an anonymous email, saying their name isn’t important, then /mod bashing, no context, and a huge part about people not liking me except that I post cosplay (if I didn’t misunderstand that) was not what I was expecting... and honestly felt a little bit stalkerish. Like I’m really creeped out and kinda scared.
I’m assuming this person has an here otherwise I have no clue how they tracked my author website and brought up the amino. It’s not a secret as to who I am because of my work/company/YA books and I didn’t want to use an old handle I was most known for back when I was late teens/early 20s because I was bullied so badly I’m still in therapy and I don’t want some people to find me because I know they will. They don’t know this handle, and don’t know my business. And like, I am happy to keep something quiet in general... but my author website is for books. This is a place for my readers and how people can my agent for subsidiary rights.
I guess like what I’m trying to say... I don’t make friends easily because of some paranoia (diagnosed, my term, not ableism), not being remotely neurotypical, and debilitating depression. So reading that... nhnnnnn freaked out... ngl....
If I’m not wanted in the YOI amino, I can leave. That’s fine. It’s like a curated community. If people want me here for my cosplay stuff and nothing else, that’s also fine and pretty much all I do. I’m not interested in drama.
Mostly I just want to share my costume stuff if I can. I want to help people with costume advice. I’d love to share stuff about my book because it’s about cosplay/literally what I do. I’d like to know how people find out about convention meets ups because I’d like to see what other people create and show people my art.
I am not interested in “exposing” people. And I’m not interested in drama. And I really... really don’t feel comfortable after that email.... talking about people in certain age ranges as being old... like... I’m moderately close imo to what was said. It’s really tough to even wear a cosplay for myself let alone share it online because I feel like I’m too old constantly and don’t belong. I think I’ve been very vocal about internet safety so like... I don’t know what else I can do. Meh... :/
TL;DR... Please don’t use my personal website form in the future unless you’re a reader of my books or you want to buy subrights (where I’d direct you to my agent). If you have something to say that you’d like to be anonymous, message me and ask me, “can I share something and have it be off the record?” And let ME decide if I want to go down that path. That is safer for me.
And please don’t gaslight me /ever again./
If people want me to leave, again I’m fine with that if it would make people more comfortable. I just want to post costumes. No drama. Honestly I’d love no more than to discuss the series and geek out over fandom with some people, but I’m kinda afraid to do so in general as I don’t think I’m that interesting and... jeez..... like really I just want to do cosplay, that’s it, and some tutorials/demos to help if I can... and I’m happy to chat in messages with people over 18 (internet safety, and again I only rp I’d over 21) abut fandom stuff but like... nhnnnnnnn. :(
Comments (10)
Dang finna block that person report em mark as spam burn it
Via an email form for my author website. Blocking isn’t an option ☹
I love having you here. That’s such a creepy email? Like wtf.
Aw thank you. And yeah, I was and still am sleeved out. Don’t need that stuff when I’m on deadline!!! Lol!
I’m so sorry this happened to you :pensive:
On a totally unrelated note, I love having you in the community! The person behind the messages is a bully who is hung up on the past and taking it out on you and other innocent people who haven’t done anything wrong. I definitely don’t think you’re too old and I love seeing the work you do! But I completely understand if you need to leave for the sake of your own privacy :pray: :two_hearts:
I’m totally fine being here! My huge worry was/is if it came from a teen or kid because I’m an advocate for youth safety and if me being 33 was too old/made people uncomfortable I’d have been happy to leave if it made anyone feel safer.
But I did want to mention like the personal website form since that’s an invasion of privacy. It’s there for my fans of my books and for subrights.
Reply to: Agent Alien
I completely understand! I don’t feel uncomfortable and I think everyone else would think the same!
That is definitely an invasion of privacy, that’s something unrelated to your amino and should only be used for legitimate reasons, if I were you I’d maybe change your email address but I don’t know how it works :pensive:
Reply to: ⋮𝒱𝒾𝓉𝓎𝒶 ✧
Unfortunately it’s actually through a form so no one knows my actual email (which was meant for protection). So changing it won’t do anything since I need to be able to have people get in . My first book was to help prevent youth LGBTQ+ su*c*de so I have a lot of teens reach out and I need to be available to provide online resources and hotline numbers. there’s a lot of responsibility. It’s exhausting at times but I don’t mind, but like... that’s really for book world. Not amino drama and gaslighting lol...
First off I'm highly upset you received an email of such context and you are completely justified in your feelings.
I however assure you absolutely no one here or on the moderation team only want you here for your cosplay. We genuinely enjoy having you here and getting to know you bit by bit.
Also you are not too old to be in this fandom. There is no rule that you can't be here because you over 18 and the person who sent the email knows this. We welcome all ages young and older all fans are welcome.
This person who emailed you was sadly banned for bullying almost 7 months ago and they can't seem to move on so they are taking it out on anyone they feel seems to enjoy the amino or get along with anyone on the moderation team. It's a true shame this person does not see what they are doing is frankly crazy and crossing so many boundaries because of a social media.
Again I truly apologize that you had to go through this. We do hope you'll stay and just ignore this person however we understand if you don't. If you want you can also pm me and I would be more then happy to talk with you about this.
So This is a known person/situation?
I’d love to stay but a huuuuge thing on my end is internet safety and I want to make sure people feel safe. If I’m like too old at 33 and that makes someone not feel safe, I absolutely don’t want to make someone uncomfortable if that makes sense?