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Rainbow Haiku

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Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

RED - Blood Princess

The Princess in red

Would become a bride tonight

In her blood tainted dress.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

=:=

ORANGE - Dancing Flames

The orange flames danced

Engulfing my little surprise

Now it has turned black.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

=:=

YELLOW - Commoner's Tragedy

A banana peel

She placed her careless foot on

Tumbling down the stairs.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

=:=

GREEN - Abandoned Waves

A stagnant ocean

Covered in abandoned slime.

No sailors in sight.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

=:=

BLUE - Splash of Paint

Uninspired canvas

Dried brush, abandoned idea.

Soaked in blue paint.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

=:=

INDIGO - One's Blood, Another's Pleasure

Farmer's bitter sweat

Plantations under the sun

A beautiful dye.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

=:=

VIOLET - Flora Kingdom

In the poppyland

Violets are spread everywhere

Very intoxicating.

Rainbow Haiku-[IMG=YGX]

[CB]RED - Blood Princess
[IC]The Princess in red
[IC]Would become a bride tonight
[IC]In her blood t

#RainbowH

None of the images belong to me.

#CDJan

Likes (37)
Comments (5)

Likes (37)

Like 37

Comments (5)

Hey Hey!

I'm Con, and thanks for partaking in Critique Day! Add #CDJan for more posts of yours to be critiqued! Now, let's get on with it! :revolving_hearts:

I really liked the Haiku! I tend to not make them but I understand the concept! The pictured in between each one representing the color also makes it better!

I really like the one with a chicken in it!

No errors, which is great! Keep it up and continue writing!

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0 Reply 01/05/19

Hello there!

And thank you for participating in Critique Day.

Your haikus are all really cute and I found the rainbow pictures intervening between them to be a very aesthetically pleasing concept.

I absolutely loved the green one by the way. Such vivid imagery in only a few words and the perfect image to go along with it!

I have two questions however:

1. Couldn't splash of Paint be about any colour?

To be honest I found it a bit off. A very generic poem compared to the rest.

2. What's the connection between poppyland and violets?

While the poem was really pretty, it really did strike me as bizarre that these two flowers would be related in any way.

Again, thank you for taking part and keep up the good work!

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0 Reply 01/05/19

Hi there!

Thank you for participating in Critique Day! Here is some of my :

- I like how there’s some kind of humour in your poetry, this makes it easy and fun to read!

- I also like how you added the pictures for each colour cause this really brightens up the post XD

- I couldn’t find any errors, so well done!

So not a lot of criticism, just a lot of praise! Well done and enjoy Critique Day!

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0 Reply 01/05/19

Hello! Thank you for participating in Critique Day!

> These are short but cute and they each tell their own story. I enjoyed reading them!

> The one I got confused on was the poem for the color yellow:

"A banana peel

She placed her careless foot on

Tumbling down the stairs."

- the order seems kind of off and the smooth rhythm that the rest had on the tongue quickly tumbled. I would simply suggest to change the order to:

"She placed her careless foot on

A banana peel

Tumbling down the stairs."

>Other than that, these were creative! Can't wait for more.

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0 Reply 01/05/19
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