Whatever this is

I don’t even know how to express my frustrations anymore. I feel like this world isn’t really even meant for me in any way. No matter what I do, how much I believe or work, how much I want something. It never seems to be for me. It’s as if the universe is consistently telling me to get lost. Why can’t I get the chance to do something I’m ionate about, get the chance to learn about it? I feel like time is running out and people are just expecting me to figure it all out over night. Everything sucks and the one thing I want for myself in life, seems impossible to achieve, seems to be something that I shouldn’t have. Anyone but me. Why? Just fucking why? I also want to be happy