living the way i want to.

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╰► oneshot

❀ ⇢ i n t r o

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↳ ❝ story statistics ::

╭❍ Words :: 2,399

╭❍ Characters :: 13,058

╭❍ Paragraphs :: 29

╭❍ Estimated Reading Time :: 10-15 min

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↳ ❝ prompt

✎﹏ this all takes place

after the death of the beloved

and well-known hero: all might.

midoriya loses all hope and

finds himiko toga with a plan.

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✦ time taken:

៚ honestly, a long time.

✦ writing status:

៚ done.

✦ apps used:

៚ google docs

✦ other stories:

៚ best birthday ever

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↳❝trigger warnings ::

suicide

foul language

manipulation

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✧ As the tears poured out of her eyes like a waterfall her body made zero movements. She herself couldn't tell if they were tears of joy or if she was in a moment of despair. Staring into his green and crazed orbs comforted the blonde in a way. When it came to Izuku she had thought that it was just this yearning iration for blood that she was stuck with ever since she was young, but no. There had always been more meaning to it. Something about this male always managed to leave her awestruck.

She didn't look at him the way she'd look at the hero killer and Ochako. With the other two, it was always just a craving triggered by how cute and exciting they looked and seemed when all bruised and battered, but not with Izuku. When it came to him there was an actual ion. A lingering feeling that was built within her. Chained, within her. Around the hero, there had always been a spark, and yet it's faded because he's no longer himself.

"What did you say?"

His body was unsteady as the overwhelming fear continued to remind him that he had been in danger. His power had once again been out of control and there was no hero he could rely on to keep him safe. It was just him and Toga. Nobody standing in their way. He didn't know what he was doing nor did he try to understand.

Exhaling a shaky breath, he did his best to stand up straight, though his legs made it feel like he was standing on stilts. Her arms dangled to the point of seeming lifeless. Questions spinning around in her mind while her facial expression explained her thoughts. A hint of happiness, confusion, and focus glimmered in her eyes while her expression resulted in dumbfounded.

"I told you that I love you."

He answered, while taking a step forward. Her breath hitched as he repeated those words that she never expected to hear from someone she fell in love with. Fearing that it was too good to be true, she took a step back. Every time she'd take the blood of a cute person, everything was onesided. She was never tied to any strings and could go around loving whoever she deemed fit. But now, does all that magic end here? All to those three simple words?

If she accepts him right here right now, what's going to happen to the blood addict? Does she stop her villainous ways in order to fulfill life with someone who actually accepts her feelings for once? Does it mean she can take his blood without the kicking and the screaming and finally call it true love? The options spun around in her mind like crazy.

Meanwhile, Izuku sat there, hoping for a certain response. He knew how the girl felt about him and he was going to use that. Their fighting from earlier was unnecessary, but as long as it led up to this moment, the male didn't care. Staring into her golden orbs, he awaited the answer he wanted to hear. This was his final resort. He had nothing.

She couldn't understand why, but everything about her right now had been hesitant. Even her gaze. Himiko, couldn't understand what she had been so afraid of. This is what she wanted right? Her legs were shaky on the rooftop of his old school. Maybe they were too high up? Maybe she couldn't accept him in a situation like this. She's drained right now, she can't think, she just wants to go back home.

She flinched when Izuku made an unexpected movement. He dropped to his knees and tightly hugged himself. Unable to hold his composure any longer, he let himself weep on the roof of his old middle school. Watching as he broke down right in front of her, she couldn't understand anything at the moment. Nothing would . Midoriya knew what his motive was and he knew how wrong it was to manipulate her like this, but, he lost everything.

"Izuku..." The blonde spoke up while staring at the broken boy.

Dropping to her knees, she slightly crawled over to him and then embraced him into a hug. It only caused his cries to grow louder. Closing her eyes, she softly played with his hair while rocking back and forth slowly. Even with her eyes closed, tears still streamed down her cheeks. A water faucet was active in both of their eyes that wasn't going to turn off anytime soon.

The blonde began to hum a tune. Not only to calm the younger hero down, but she also needed to put herself at ease. She didn't want to make the wrong choice once she finally managed to scrape herself off the ground. A gentle smile appeared on her expression as she played with the male's hair who was beginning to calm down. They both were beginning to calm down until finally, a large boom filled their ears.

The grip she had on him instantly tighten as a result of her fear and urge to protect him. Glaring at the door to the roof, she saw a rather familiar ash-blonde glaring at the both of them. Izuku thought that he had already known what this was. He didn't bother to make any sudden movements as of now, but he knew he needed to move soon. Turning his body in Toga's arms, he was faced with the one and only Katsuki Bakugou. The last person he expected to show up.

"Deku... Just what the fuck do you think you're doing?" He fumed.

His green jaded eyes widened with horror before he scurried to his feet. Toga furrowed her brows due to his reaction to the ash-blonde showing up. Turning her gaze back to the pointy-haired male, she rose to her feet while pulling a knife out of her skirt pocket and getting into a defensive position with the knife pointed at him. Izuku glanced in her direction before shaking his head.

"Himiko Toga right? Look, villain, I may be a hero but I'm not your enemy right now. Whoever you've known Deku as before he's not the fuckin' same!"

"Shut up, Kacchan!" The green-haired male shouted, surprisingly speaking against his former bully.

"Tch."

Toga's body began to tremble. She may have been insane in a sense but she was still smart. Deku picked up on it before he realized his plan was in the motion of failing. Bakugou's appearance hadn't been planned. Standing next to Himiko he moved closer to her causing her body's position to falter much more.

He turned back and noticed a bunch of cop cars had shown up. Silently cursing under his breath he turned back to Bakugou who had been sweating slightly. Katsuki's lower lip quivered before he heard a feminine voice call out a specific name followed by footsteps. It brought a smirk to Katsuki's face.

"Deku please don't do it!" She shouted until making herself visible when she got to the door.

"Uraraka..." He quietly yet sadly spoke her name.

She had a fire of determination and yet doubt lit within her hazel eyes. Izuku gazed at her while thinking twice about the decisions he was beginning to make. He had to make a choice sooner or later because the heroes shouldn't be too far from here now. Becoming more aware of the situation he began calculating the probability of this entire thing failing in his mind. To Midoriya, it was rather high.

"Himiko, I don't think we can make it out of here, " he told her in a soft whisper.

"So what do we do?" She asked in a hesitant voice.

"Deku I know it's been rough since All Might died, but you can't do something like this!" Uraraka shouted with her fists balled up.

Listening to her words, Midoriya knew exactly what she had been trying to do. It was something that always happened in movies. She's both trying to persuade and stall for time, but the green-haired male had no intention of falling for it. An audience or not, he will get what he wants. Izuku Midoriya will see All Might again if it meant playing with a villain's life and emotions. Fighting back the tears, he answered her,

"We jump."

After hearing those words, she could feel her body tense up. Her eyes widened in disbelief by the way his words simply rolled off the tongue as though it were nothing. After feeling her stomach drop about three floors beneath her, she glanced in his direction almost as if he had been crazy. Much crazier than herself.

Not moments after that, she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist. They had been Midoriya's. After analyzing him from the forest and during the provisional license exam, she had a hard time understanding where he had gotten such confidence from. In her eyes, he was meek but very intelligent. Saving lives was supposed to be his priority. Apparently saving his own wasn't on the list. For once in her life, Himiko felt lost.

"I told you I loved you, right? If they take you, hostage, there's nothing waiting for you aside from torture. Heroes aren't as nice as they seem, but you already knew that, " he explained in a weary whisper.

"Stop whispering over there assholes!" Katsuki shouted, causing Midoriya to shoot him a glare.

"Himiko!" Uraraka shouted causing the blonde to flinch.

She ed Uraraka all too well. The brunette had been one of the people she found interesting. One of the people that she simply refuses to forget about. They became "friends" in the forest after all.

"As much as I hate to say this, you can't trust Deku right now! He's out of his mind!" She explained in a panicked voice. This caused Midoriya's heart to crush. Knowing that she of all people didn't trust him, hurt him in a way. A way that could not yet be explained.

"Himiko, those three words are nothing to lie about. I love you, so we need to jump. This is your choice."

As those words echoed throughout her ears her body had been no longer tense. Relaxing her muscles, the blonde's gaze shifted to the floor. Blocking out the noise of Bakugou, Uraraka, and Midoriya arguing, she began to what she was a villain for. Until she heard those words, Izuku made her forget her purpose.

While all those memories flooded back, that crazed smile we all know and love appeared on her expression. ing, why she looked up to the Hero Killer. ing who she wanted to be finally brought her back to her senses. She ed who Himiko Toga really was, and this time, she wasn't going to forget. When she came to, all she heard was,

"What's the problem all of a sudden, Kacchan?! You were the one who told me to do this back in middle school, so why are you stopping me?! This is where my story could've ended because of you!" And it's all happening. Just a different scenario but the same place.

Due to Midoriya not being entirely focused on the blonde, she managed to slip out of his grip without him noticing. A giggle escaped her lips causing Midoriya to turn in her direction. Realizing he had no longer been holding her, his eyes widened. That was when she grabbed his hand and began to guide him to the edge of the building.

"NO!" Both Uraraka and Bakugou shouted at the same time.

Midoriya's heart began to pound out of his chest as the realization hit him, that they were really going to go through with this. Once they were close enough to the edge, she turned her body toward him, giggling slightly. Not being able to understand it, he faced her while both of their sides had been facing where they were supposed to fall.

She grabbed his second hand and gazed at him with a small and genuine smile lacing her lips. Mesmerized by her, he finally took a moment to realize how beautiful she actually was. At first glance, she didn't look like the psycho murderer the entire world saw her out to be. But he already knew that looks didn't define a person.

While holding his hands, she could feel his body trembling. Turning her head she looked down and realized how high up they really were. She took note of the flashing lights of the police cars that surrounded the building. Turning back to the former hero in training, she held onto his hands much tighter while Uraraka and Katsuki were unable to move due to the fear of their movements causing Himiko and Midoriya's death.

Either way, it didn't matter what those two heroes did. This moment was inevitable though there was no way they could know that. Nodding to Izuku, he gulped in response. In an attempt to put him at ease, she leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips causing Uraraka to feel a slight twinge in her heart. A slight blush spread across, Izuku's face in response.

His first kiss.

"I love you too, " she muttered after pulling away, still unaware of the fact his confession had been fake.

He let out a shaky breath clearly failing to hide his fear. He then nodded at her before leaning in to hug her tightly. Slightly gripping her shirt, he let the tears flow since he finally knew he was going to see All Might again. Nothing but a soft smile had been on her lips.

After a few seconds, she slowly wrapped her arms around the green-haired male as to return his embrace. She gently pet his head as an attempt to soothe him and prepare him for what was about to occur. Moments later, they slowly leaned off of the building while in each other's embrace. The screams of Uraraka and Katsuki echoed throughout both of their ears as the sound of wind also filled their ears.

"I love Izuku Midoriya, along with his blood. I'm not doing this because I'm scared of what will happen if I get caught. I'm doing this, because, for me, it counts as living the way I want to. I will gladly die, with Deku-Kun, because this is my choice." ✧

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❀ ⇢ c o n c l u s i o n

✿ tags

#villainmonth2019

✿ inspiration

nothing big. this was an idea

that got sister snatched from

a friend. or something we decided

i should write. hope you enjoyed!