• misophonia and my chewing gum phobia •

im posting a poem from my class.

This one is a free form poem but this one is about misophonia, or as I dubbed it ‘my chewing gum phobia’ though it doesn’t only pertain to chewing gum. To those who don’t know, misophonia is when you have certain noises that trigger a fight or flight response. I have several, one being chewing. The others are typing, snoring, clock ticking, sniffling and pretty much anything really repetitive if I’m in a bad mood. This is more than a simple annoyance but triggers full on anxiety attacks. It is not a joke and it isn’t to be taken lightly.

•••

I sit down in class

Yet I am not really there,

Zoned out, not present, perhaps aloof too.

A lecture in the background,

Hands raised,

Yet I somehow can’t adjust my gaze.

A sound is all I hear

Drilling holes in my ears.

Chewing gum in his mouth,

Smushed between his teeth

Jaws chomping unbearably loud.

Lips smacking, sloshing and splashing,

Impolite, obnoxious eating habits

My eyes are locked on his mouth

Glued despite

A noise disorder and my fist curled ever so tight.

Fight or flight

No bark only bite.

My eyes venomous,

wrapped up in a glare

Yet all I can do is sit,

Wish I wasn’t there.

My chest feels tight,

Breath in, now out,

Pretend you aren’t there.

•••