Suho’s Buns

ENJOY

1,685 words

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Suho sits there in front of the mirror getting ready for his concert. He can’t exactly the where of the concert but that’s not important. All that matters is whether or not it’s a great performance.

Sehun knocks lightly and peeks his head through the dressing room door, “We’re all waiting for you behind stage; it’s time to get into our starting positions. Are you almost ready?”

Suho looks over, “Uh, yeah! I just need to finish up real quick.” Suho turns back around to finish up doing whatever he was doing prior to Sehun’s presence.

Sehun opens the door and steps in, “You don’t even have your shirt on. What are you doing?” Sehun walks over and rests his hand on Junmyeon’s shoulder, he looks down to see him sticking two hotdog buns together. “Junmyeon... What the actual hell are you doing? Have you gone insane? We have to start our concert soon and your busy— doing 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴. Whatever 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 is.” Sehun gestures to Suho’s dressing table with all the hot glue sticks and split-in-half hotdog buns spread all over it.

Junmyeon stands up and begins shooing Sehun from his dressing room, “Uh, don’t worry about it, Sehun. Just go back to the others and I’ll be with you all in a sec.”

“Nono, you’re not continuing your crazy in here, you’re coming with me,” Sehun grabs Suho’s hand and begins to pull him out.

“I can’t! I’m not ready yet,” he takes Sehun’s hand off his. “I promise you that I’ll be out in a few minutes. Just don’t mention this to the others. You know they’ll make fun of me.”

Sehun chuckles, “Dude,” Sehun gestures to himself, “𝘐’𝘮 gonna make fun of you. You were 𝘏𝘖𝘛 𝘎𝘓𝘜𝘌𝘐𝘕𝘎 hotdog buns together!”

“Just don’t out me, okay?” Junmyeon pleads.

Suho and Sehun exchange a couple of silent bro-looks and they both come to an understanding.

“Okay okay. I’ll give you no more than five minutes. If you’re late I’m telling them what you were doing in here.” Sehun walks out of the dressing room, leaving the door slightly cracked open.

Junmyeon lets out a sigh of relief and walks back to his table and stares at his glue sticks and hotdog buns. “I guess two will be enough today...” Suho takes his coat and one freshly hot glued hotdog bun and stuffs it in his coat on top of his shoulder and does the same with the other side. He stares at himself in the mirror and adjusts his coat. “Looks good enough for tonight I guess. My shoulders could look smaller I suppose.” Suho turns his body perpendicular to the mirror and checks himself out at a sideways angle. He presses his lips together in dissatisfaction and shrugs. He shouldn’t dwell on how big or small his back looks right now, he’s got a performance to attend to and he can’t be late.

Junmyeon enters back stage and he and Sehun make eye . Their bro eye tells Suho he’s two minutes late but isn’t able to find out whether or not Sehun told anyone about a few minutes ago.

Suho nervously gets into position and they all slowly raise up onto stage.

During the whole performance, Suho forgets about the whole Sehun seeing him hot glueing hotdog buns together and potentially getting exposed for it thing from earlier. The whole concert seemed to go by so quickly, even though the exhaustion his body was experiencing was saying other wise.

It’s only until the last song where Suho gets so into his performance that he re the previous events that transpired.

The memories come flooding back when he gets too hot and slips his coat from his shoulders and one of the bun’s expose itself and attempt to make a quick run for it. The bun slips down to his left pectoral muscle before Suho can pin it against his nipple.

𝘚𝘩𝘪𝘵. 𝘚𝘩𝘪𝘵. 𝘕𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵. 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯’𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴. 𝘕𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦’𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘧𝘧! Junmyeon can practically hear his hotdog bun greeting his nipple with a small, “𝘏𝘪𝘪𝘪!!”

Junmyeon manages to slide the greeting bun up his armpit and into his sleeve. Then the other bun begins to also slide down his body. In frustration, Suho whips his coat in time to catch sliding bun no.2 and also stuff it into his sleeve all subtilely and in time with the choreo.

At this point, Suho realizes that there’s a giant exaggerated arm movement that’ll send his buns absolutely flying if he doesn’t take the proper precaution. The proper way to handle it of course being, clutch the end of your sleeve or so help the person who gets smacked with the projectile bun. Bullet Buns, he’ll be known as he decided. His new nickname will totally be something dumb like that.

The dance move is fast approaching. Suho begins to make his way to close the bottom of his sleeve, but it’s too late. Suho’s grip on his sleeve slips and his other hand completely fails to grab anything. Next thing he knows one bun falls onto the stage floor and the other shoots out and hits Baekhyun right in the eye with the smallest, most anti-climatic pap noise echoing in his mic during his epic high note. The note is abruptly cut off with a small “—𝘢𝘩!” from Baek.

There’s a cut off laugh from Sehun who saw everything but he keeps dancing as if nothing happened.

The performance somehow continues as if nothing happened, just as Suho prefers. But afterwards was a bit different.

Junmyeon lays back in the car seat to avoid the possibility of talking about the bun zooming across the stage. But isn’t quite successful.

“Hey Baekhyun, did that hotdog bun hurt you at all?” Sehun says clearly so that Junmyeon will be able to hear from across the van.

“Yeah kinda, I think I still have crumbs in my eye,” Baekhyun rubs and blinks his eyes, “or maybe it’s just a loose eyelash.”

Sehun leans in closer to take a look at Baekhyun’s eyes even though he can’t see shit because it’s so damn dark in the vehicle. “No, no. I think it’s bread crumbs.”

“Crap. I hope this doesn’t affect my vision long term. Where do you think that bun came from? It seemed to fly over from your end of the stage. I don’t think any one from the crowd would have that good of an arm or be able to smuggle in some shitty, hard bread.”

“I think I have a few ideas,” Sehun gives Baekhyun a smug look that he can’t see but Suho can hear.

Junmyeon sits up in and leans around Sehun’s chair, “Um, Sehun. Can you come back here real quick? I gotta talk to you.”

“Oh Suho! Do you have any idea where that bread came from?” Sehun says with a hint of sarcasm in his voice that only Suho would be able to pick up. In big exaggerated movements, Sehun crosses his legs and places his elbow on the armrest and places his chin in the palm of his hand.

Suho purses his lips, “Sehun, come back here!“ he quietly hisses.

“Okay okay—“

Junmyeon yanks Sehun to the back of the car and forces him to sit in the closest chair to him.

Junmyeon says in a low voice, “You didn’t tell the guys about the hotdog buns, right?”

“What’s that Junmyeon? That stale bun that hit Baek in the eye was 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴?” Sehun says of course with the purpose of Baekhyun hearing, which he did.

Baekhyun pops his eyes over his seat to look back at them.

“shUSH!” Junmyeon yell whisphers and covers Sehun’s mouth, “Don’t say that!”

Sehun leans out of Suho’s mouth-hold and holds Suho’s hands from him, “Myeon, are you kidding with me right now? You stuff your jacket with bread before every concert performance?” He laughs.

“SEHUN!”

Baekhyun stifles a laugh, “Junmyeon you what now?”

Sehun gives Suho a cheeky smile and goes back to his seat next to Baekhyun. “Funny right? I walked into his dressing room as he was hot glueing two buns together.”

“Are you joking?! Junmyeon! Are you going crazy?!” Baekhyun chuckles, “Do we have to give you a brain scan?” Baekhyun leans over his chair and places the back of his hand on Suho’s forehead.

“No! And I’m not sick either!” Junmyeon whacks Baekhyun’s hand off him.

Baek and the younger laugh to themselves and Junmyeon sighs.

“I thought you said you wouldn’t tell anyone,” Suho pouts.

“I wasn’t until you sent a bun flying cross the stage and hurt one of our . Plus, you were two minutes late. It was in our agreement that I could if you were late,” Sehun waggles his little finger at Suho behind him.

Junmyeon slumps back into his seat, “It’s not my fault. You didn’t give me enough time to secure my bread in my jacket ...”

Sehun chuckles, “With what? Hot glue?”

“No! Tape!”

“What purpose does bread have for you to want to take bread in your coat?” Baekhyun pipes up.

“They make my shoulders wider!” Junmyeon pouts further and looks out the window as the other two laugh about Junmyeon’s weird bread secret all the way until they arrive at the hotel.

The second they stop moving, Baekhyun slides the door open and runs over to the other car before the other two could even step foot outside.

“HEY GUYS, GUESS WHAT! I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED DURING THE CONCERT!”

“This is ass. This is why I told you not to tell anyone,” Junmyeon frowns.

The Baekhyun was sharing his cool story with laugh.

“LOL 𝘉𝘜𝘓𝘓𝘌𝘛 𝘉𝘜𝘕𝘚!” Jongin shouts across the parking lot.

“Tch. I fuckin’ knew I’d be called that.” Suho hisses.

“Haha, you know we love you,” Sehun says with a distant Baekhyun saying “𝘖𝘰𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘢 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘦!” to Kai.

Suho playfully punches Sehun’s arm with a slight smile, “Shut up.”

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Hey guys! interesting story, I know. If you made it all the way to the end, I really appreciate it! Thank you for reading it as well. This took me all day to write believe it or not.

This whole story was based around this photo here

because his shoulder ACTUALLY looks like a hotdog bun. Like, W H A T?

and so then this story around why he has buns on his shoulder was born. Like, I didn’t know muscle did that??

Anyway. That’s all for now! Thank you if you enjoyed your time and bye!

#featurethis

Is this story too weird to be featured? Lol