A Lonely Mind & A Heartbreak Is Deadly

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Welcome to my response for the third Prompt Club Challenge! My first response to the prompts. If you’re interested in checking out the post, you can follow the link below! Or, if you’re interested in ing the club, follow the other link to the official wiki

Writing Prompts Challenges

Prompt Club Wiki

I’m using the prompt "Sometimes the worst place you can be is in your own head.”

With all that being said here’s my take on this prompt!

#PCChallenge

:warning: Trigger Warning :warning:

There are hints at suicide and murder so if that triggers you in anyway please refrain from reading.

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I’m alone again. Well, not quite. There’s one thing that occupies me endlessly. Painfully. Loudly. It’s always screaming at me, telling me to stop. Stop living. Stop trying. Just stop! I want it to end but it doesn’t; it’s like I have a million people stuck in my mind all trying to speak at the same time. All trying their very best to be heard, but failing miserably.

Then I met him. He was kind, patient and never pushed me to open my arms too quickly. He let me go at my own pace. All whilst he held on to my hand and guided me. When I was with him, the voices stopped. They were quite and I could think clearly for myself, so every time he had to leave me, I was scared; because I knew what I would be stuck with once he left.

I’ve been stuck in my head, the worst place to be, for almost my entire teenage and adult life. I’ve been fighting it, trying to ignore them, but one too many times did they nearly succeed. I tried so many times to just end everything. To end the suffering. I wanted to be in silence and peace for once. That’s why, when I met him, I knew I had to hold on and keep him. So I stopped walking and I spoke. Well maybe I shouted, but i said what I needed.

”Please. I like you, no. I Love You and I Need You. When I’m with you everything is peaceful, and it’s quiet. My mind finally feels as lonely as I’ve felt for 16 years; but it’s not fighting against me, it’s almost like my mind is happy when you’re here. So please, stay?”

When I looked at his face, I thought I’d messed up, but then he smiled and said, “When I’m with you, my heart feels whole again, so I think we need each other more than we think.” He held me close and kissed my forehead, and for once I’d finally felt like I could be at peace and that even when he was gone, I would be okay, and the voices would be happy and wouldn’t be so unsettled.

Months went by and we were happy. We settled together and were doing well. We’d had the odd argument here and there, but it was never anything serious; But things started to change in him. He became less attentive in me and more attentive in something else, or someone else. He would be gone from early in the morning, to late evening. Then I found out and things came crashing down.

I found him with another girl. Not just hanging out or something, he was in OUR bed sleeping naked next to her. That’s when I realised he had lied about needing me because he though I was easy. He thought I wouldn’t catch on for a while, or would just forgive him, but I’ve learnt not to forgive so easily anymore.

When he came home that night he was welcomed by many different things, other than me. First of all, I left the apartment in the state he left my heart; torn to shreds. Then, I wrote him a little note, telling him not to search for me or attempt to pretended he care or to try and apologise. Finally, everything he’d ever given to me or had received from me was now his to keep.

Oh and I couldn’t forget his precious prize. You he voices? Well let’s just say, one of their many ideas was carried out and I still walk free to this day.

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I bet you didn’t see that twist coming? I enjoyed writing this piece and I hope you all enjoyed it too. I look forward to writing more using the prompts and I hope you all look forward to using any prompts I post in the future too.

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